02.06
Oh God, this again.
Oh crap, the robot’s back. And this time, it’s in a field, since that’s where robots usually roam at before getting poached by local resistance fighters. I can understand a robot having stiff dialogue, but hear what the girl says. “Wait a minute, to think that something is strange means, you have knowledge of that which is not strange.” She speaks the dialogue that people use to be deep, when in actuality, they’re just being pretentious in their tedium. Like a thick-ass YA book that thinks it’s the next Jane Eyre, which kind of describes Clannad quite well, actually.
After a montage of all the girls either walking or staring at the wall, Nagisa decides to risk her school attendance by waiting for Tomoya to walk with her since independence for so much as a few minutes is frowned upon in the Clannad-verse. Next, they can cuddle and talk about how cute the cherry blossoms are while reluctantly whispering about how much they love each other.
Fortunately, Kyou runs them over and alludes to how the writing staff has sewn the red threads around them, to which Nagisa says is “ludicrous”. Yeah, as ludicrous as the ghost you were befriending for the last few episodes. After checking if he’s hurt, Nagisa gets asked about that time they greeted each other by their first names. I know this is supposed to be a big deal in Japan when you no longer refer to someone by their last name, but in a dub that’s been marketed to English audiences, it just feels awkward. If I’m gonna get dialogue like this, I may as well watch a fansub, not a dub that people were actually paid to make.
At the monotonous halls that they call a school, Sunohara keeps talking about how Nagisa makes him hard. Instead of letting him talk shit about his most-definitely-not-girlfriend, Tomoya tries to point him in the direction of the library girl, who then ignores his spastic personality like a completely normal person would. Our protagonist decides to talk to Kotomi about that drama club they stalled a few episodes ago. She gets introduced to Nagisa, but it’s harder to do so than getting a one-year-old to crawl. They do free association, hiragana comparisons, randomly opening things, and talking about how shiny their hair is. I thought pot was frowned upon in Japanese society.
Kotomi also seems to misunderstand the concept of fiction by thinking she has to cry when it comes to a verse involving tears. Realizing that she somehow doesn’t have a social worker, Tomoya decides to walk her home after those grueling four minutes of school. Kotomi notes how she usually gets scared when having to socially interact, something that I can’t complain about since I’m afflicted with such a condition. However, this doesn’t justify her urge to take scissors and cut out pages from books. Seeing this, Tomoya gets into a tizzy and thinks that she should get out of the library for once. Because fuck reading. Why should you read when you can watch such critically-acclaimed anime such as Clannad?
She proceeds to be introduced to Kyou, who groans and wonders why the Hell Tomoya isn’t trying to make the moves on Nagisa like a normal guy would. Having failed, Kotomi decides to build up a good pick-up line in order to gain friends; her next chance being Fortune-Telling Doormat. With some cards, Doormat predicts her future will be forever alone. Initially crying and trying to run away, Kotomi gets her arm dragged by Tomoya in order to hear how time can be rewritten. You know, the long-haired sister who didn’t think poker cards were an effective way to understand life was probably the better choice as a friend.
Step 2 of friend-making commences when Kotomi tries to build up her lines: “Hello. How do you do? I’m Kotomi Ichinose from 3-A. I love to read. It would make me so very happy if you and I could be friends.” She’s supposed to be a bookworm, right? I mean, socially awkward or not, someone who’s read through a goddamn library should make a more natural introduction than that. But no, because the writers think that mental afflictions are funny.
Soon after, they meet a bear. She doesn’t talk or do anything that normal people would, so our basket case of the arc basically assumes she’s an actual stuffed bear. After accepting her friendship proposal, Kotomi really warms up to her. Really.
Sunohara pops out, noticing who the bear is, and mispronounces “revenge” because he’s brain-damaged or something. By his words, it sounds like “Ribbons” or “Livonze”, as if he has a personal vendetta against the Innovators. Then, he gets kicked. Meh. I’m at the point where these things don’t matter anymore.
They go to lunch and meet a custodian who Kotomi also greets with friendship, because everyone needs to be friends with Kotomi or suffer wrath. However, the lunch lady recognizes her last name and realizes that her parents were college professors. After being probed by this, she just whimpers a bit because personal history can’t be revealed until drama commands it.
Yeah, I know. If she just off-handedly remarks upon her personal life, it would ruin the story. But fuck the story if it requires it to happen at the most dramatic moment than at a realistic point. Points like these make me think I’m more at home watching Waterloo Road than this.
Kyou runs in and grabs her, breasts squeezing together in true yuri fashion, and decides to be friends. They all meet at that vacant classroom so Kotomi can introduce herself to everybody. Then we get a whole two minutes of the characters talking about themselves and their hobbies. After figuring out what to do about the Drama Club, Kotomi runs outside in search of the Music Club because violins are shiny. She plays one, and automatically creates the Brown Note just because.
Haha, asocial, smart people don’t know shit about music.
Then in our final scene, Stalin in a trenchcoat and sunglasses appears. Maybe he realized Hitler lived here and wanted to exact his revenge.
Originally posted on December 17, 2011